Two thoughts kept nagging my brain every time I scratched my body. First one: pricking the skin with a needle will cause bleeding, why isn’t the case with a bedbug bite? Kimutwe came to my aid; mosquitoes, fleas, bedbugs have a magical way of opening the vein and closing it down after feasting on you. … Continue reading Bedbugs and then a giant bedbug
You must recall that a few days ago I came face to face with a possible replacement of my rib. You also recall that the said rib gave me a date that fell on a kula hepi day baptized Valentine’s in memory of an extraordinary Homo sapiens who was born before you and me in … Continue reading Close shave with death on Valentine’s Day.
Several years back before you and I were born the main CEO in the Pope’s land, also called Rome, was one Claudius the Cruel. Claudius was so tough that when fewer recruits turned up to join his KDF he declared no man should replace his rib. In other words, no coalition in the form of … Continue reading Come valentine’s, come!
Yesterday begun with Mama Promulgation, Oti’s queen, whining about boys and dogs. How come when and where there is one there is the other, she wondered? She was barely done when some boys – accompanied by some dogs, no less - appeared. Her whining went full throttle because as long-time-no-see dog friends met each would … Continue reading This is why Kababa goes gaga over vehicles
I need not ask whether you love chicken because I know you do. Possibly, you are tearing one apart as I write this. If you are a sufferer of Jah like Wizard you could be salivating over a somersaulting one behind a window pane. And no, I am not just addressing Waingo to whom chickens … Continue reading Wizard in trouble as the hunter becomes the hunted.
Pythagoras sir, you prophesized that I would remember you one day. Today is the day. Good people, meet Mr. Muchai alias Pythagoras, my maths teacher at Githioro Primary School. Oh yeah, you guessed right: Muchai inherited his nickname from an extraordinary resident of Samos in Greece who started the Pythagoras Theorem, a gospel that my … Continue reading The exam scandal
As I trek to town this tout throws me that look last seen on an angry, hungry and ugly man. His mathree is half-empty, or half-full, or maybe half the passengers cannot be seen with a naked eye. But then it must be half-empty since he is shouting ‘tao chwani!’ The tout on the mathree … Continue reading My irreducible minimums
There once lived a man named Zachary and his rib Elizabeth. The two had high blood pressure because whenever they tried to execute the order given to their greatest grandparents to populate the earth they drew blanks. Unlike Sarah who, finding herself in a similar crisis, told Abraham to change the job description of their … Continue reading Mama Wizzy’s dilemma
If you have been with me lately you know that we’ve been saluting some heroes who took me from writing a e i a o u to the point where I can write vindu vichenjaga without fear or favour. The heroes belong to a profession which, needless to say, is the father and mother of … Continue reading Let’s salute some heroes – Part 2
Let me take this opportunity to salute a bunch of tough Kenyans who spent years doing abracadabra with numbers and letters in an attempt to make yours truly a tough Kenyan. Weather they achieved their goal is neither here nor there. For some fellows to graduate from a mathematical table in the name of … Continue reading Let’s salute some heroes – Part 2